20210211 - Armagan's Postdoc Blog

We continue to wait for Aria.

The snowfall of the century began in Germany in the week that Aria would born. We were afraid of this :) Teaspoon-sized snowflakes quickly fell to the ground, turning all the roofs, roads and gardens into white. Since the temperature will be around -10 degrees for a few more days, there is no possibility of melting.

The most snowy hours were today's dawn (08.02.2021). Derya thought the birth had begun. So I called the ambulance. It was 3.30 at night. At 4, the ambulance arrived, but due to the rules, they did not pick me up. I started to walk on the road. There was no bus or tram. I thought I might go to the city center, maybe I could find a taxi. While I was walking on the road, Derya called and said that the birth had not started. That's why the hospital couldn't let me in. Well, I got back home.

The Aria adventure continues like this. Derya at hospital, I am home.

On the other hand, in my research project, I am advancing on data. But for a few weeks my working intensity for the project will slow down, even slowed down due to Aria :) Now I find the strength to carry out all the work in my mind. Besides all these enthusiastic activities, I want to start over writing poetry. Two years ago I started writing regularly. Occasionally I wrote poems that I liked very much. Now I'm ready again. As time progresses, I understand better how dull a life without art would be. I think I manage to live in the moment. Art is a great way to do that. But not just for that. Being interested in art can also make our memories more meaningful. In fact, engaging in art helps us looking to the future with hope. It especially helps us to fill the thought gaps in this period of transition in the world in a healthy way.

I had started playing keyboard when I was a kid. I've been interested in music for as long as I can remember myself. Even if I do not understand the lyrics of many songs in many genres in various languages, I do remember and sing by heart. But this is not my main skill. The human voice, which is the basis of music, and the use of language, which is the basis of that voice, I think is the subject I am most skilled in. That's why I can easily write articles such as stories and diaries. The language I use on this blog is simpler than the language I normally use. So don't criticize it right away :)

Poetry, on the other hand, is perhaps because of its connection with language and music, I can understand when I read it and express myself in the easiest way when I write. But here I forget to take care of it during the daily rush. This situation prevents me from getting over the aridity in life. Fortunately, I'm ready for anything now. Maybe I'm faced with a state of readiness for being a father. What to do, let me do it right now. What I wanted to do, let me do it right now. That's why I would like to write a poem here and I'm writing right away.

Right, it's true that I'm thirsty.

I've been hungry for a long time

That I eat and drink relentlessly when I found it

It is true that I am addicted or not able to quit.

I spent my years for

It's true that I endure its thorn every time without hesitation.

Good feeling inside me. What if I could see my feelings?

I could not be enlightened in my consciousness.

---

Aria is welcome.

We went to the hospital with my wife on a snowy Wednesday night. This time we were both sure the labor had begun. The baby we were waiting for came to our arms in Thursday morning. For almost a week, all we have done is "take care of it". While her everything is great, she has a constant desire for attention. It's kind of "I'm here, get used to not forgetting me for a second." into the bargain. So men and women become parents. People do not become mothers and fathers in the sense of nature, they become parents more by social meanings. So the human baby might still want to be center of interest, even if her needs are fully met.

I will focus on my academic studies in the next few blog writings. Therefore, we can predict that it will take a long time before a new writing arrives. Nowadays it's Aria time, love of the century :)